The dreaded CPAP

So much has happened since I last shared about my beloved and his sleep-challenged nights.

He underwent a gruelling CPAP trail. When I say gruelling, I mean challenging, frustrating, time consuming, time wasting, sleep depriving and marriage testing.

It was supposed to be a four-week trial. Fine, Steve always like to challenge the norm. So, his trail extended over eight-weeks. YES 8-weeks!

What the CPAP trial involved

This trial period encompassed weekly visits to the CPAP machine dude to adjust straps, and change face masks. He tried yet another machine and consistently informed the CPAP machine dude that it just wasn’t working!! 

Add in there, another overnighter in hospital for a second sleep study. Plus Christmas, New Year and a trip to Melbourne. All this adds up to a very tired, very frustrated Stephen – AND his friend.

We worked out, over the eight-week period that Steve needed to be in bed for at least 10 hours so he could get about eight hours’ sleep – how crazy is that?!?!

Toward the end, he would simply rip the mask off and throw it on the floor, sometimes it sounded like it flew across the room – ha!

Why did he keep trying?!?!

The main reason he kept persisting was because of the obstructive AND central apnoea’s.

For those that don’t know, there are two main types of sleep apnoea’s. Here’s me sounding like I know what I’m talking about. Anyhoo, there are obstructive apnoea’s which as the name suggests involves the closing or collapsing of the nasal passage or throat during sleep.

Then there are the central apnoea’s which is when the brain says ‘What is more important at the moment…breathing or sleep? Sleep, so I will stop breathing.’


So, you can see the frustration his big brain is trying to kill itself and thus my Special Friend.

Plus, while Steve is struggling to sleep and breathe my struggle involves…

1. listening to him breath to make sure he is still breathing and to poke him when he stops breathing and

2. struggling with myself and my awakeness as I listen to him snore – LOUDLY. Thus my awakeness and not wanting to wake him. I know he needs his sleep but then not being able to sleep myself <insert wide-eyed-yet-tired emoji>

What’s next in the no-sleep saga?

After EIGHT WEEKS of the CPAP trial my love, my darling-whom-I-want-to-sleep-in-another-room underwent a second sleep study with the damned CPAP machine.

The results were not much better and resulted in a visit to see the $400 per appointment specialist – thank you very much!!

Now, this individual, who we shall not name, is obviously very intelligent and knows his stuff to be charging $400 a visit however his Dr patient and communication skills were rather stunted.

Not to say he was rude, simply separate, clinical and lacking in compassion.

Judgements aside, Steve was poked and prodded in his nose and throat for the Dr to determine the next best course of action.

Firstly, he said Steve could stop the CPAP because it was ‘clearly not making any difference.’ Do you think?? But yay, thank goodness.

Secondly, he said Steve would be ‘a good candidate for surgery.’ This surgery could/would involve correcting his deviated septum – in other words re-straightening his broken/crooked nose (WHAT? You mean to say I married damaged goods??? He has a crooked nose??? That explains why his sunglasses never sit straight on his face – ha!!! Aw but I love him and his crooked nose)

Surgery would/could also involve removing his adenoids and even, in a separate surgery, removing a section of his soft palette – argh, omg, yukko that does not sound good at all!

We left the appointment with information to consider and a referral to see a nearby Otolaryngologist. That’s a fancy, unpronounceable way of saying an ear, nose and throat specialist and surgeon.


Check out Yes, the not-sleeping saga continues for more.